Monday, April 1, 2013


Good Friday and Easter commemorate the death, burial and resurrection of Jesus Christ, so it's only natural that my thoughts wander to the many ways this is experienced in our lives. From the very hungry caterpillar resurrecting to a beautiful butterfly to the addict who finds new hope and life in sobriety, starting over is a concept we all both struggle to attain and struggle to deal with, simultaneously.

I'm a firm believer in the fact that if you've had a bad start, you can always start again.  There may be things that stand in your way, but if you are determined enough, you will find a way.  You may have to rely on others to help make those changes, and that could be difficult for you if you're someone, like me, who is independent and not too keen on asking others for help.  When it's time to make a change, though, you need to set your pride aside and do what is necessary to begin again. 

Sometimes it happens to you when you're not expecting it, when you really don't even want it. Your spouse comes home and announces they want a divorce. Your child is diagnosed with a potentially-fatal illness.  The person you thought would be your closest and best friend forever now, for whatever reason, isn't there for you any more.  The job you thought you would always have suddenly has ended.  You have no choice in the matter other than to start over again. Acceptance of what has happened is a big first hurdle you must clear.  But dwelling in the past will only hold you back longer, so acceptance is necessary to move forward. 

Our ability to start over again, renew ourselves, resurrect our lives, is vital to our happiness and also is a boost to our self-esteem because when we successfully make a change for the better, we are more confident in our abilities to handle future changes and obstacles. Take things one day at a time and only deal with what you absolutely need to deal with when you're feeling overwhelmed or anxious about new changes. You have to be able to overcome negative thought patterns and start viewing things with a positive outlook so that you can see the opportunities instead of the stumbling blocks.  Train yourself to look for the silver lining or the positive aspects of the change you are about to make or which has already happened.

I recently told a friend that if you make decisions based on all the potentially negative "what-ifs", then you're effectively closing off all potential of any positive "what-ifs" that could happen.  Don't ever lose sight of hope, for it is hope which gives us the power to begin again.


  1. This is so very true. It takes more effort to dream up a dream and not start it than it does to start it. Starting over is very scary, but those what-ifs will always be there if you never do it.

  2. This is not an easy thing to learn, is it, this dealing with changes not of your choice? I tell my kids all the time, you can't always choose the things that happen in your life, but you can choose the way in which you deal with them. I pray they learn to do it with littler things, so when big changes happen, they will at least have some idea of what to do.
    Beautiful post.

  3. This is a hard lesson to learn, but an important one. xo

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  5. I've started over and renewed so many times, I should have the skin of a new born baby's butt.

    Good words to live by my friend.. not sure I do all the time. I live in the what if world and it does hold me back, but I do work through it.. just takes me longer.